Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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