East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
