I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
