i'm signing you up for texting rehab
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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