Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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