yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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