She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
