We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
