i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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