i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
