ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
