did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
