Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
When are your genitals available?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Randomize
