I'm going to jail i love you
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
