I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
