If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
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