How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
