miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
