butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
