There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize