You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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