Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
