i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
