u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My vagina just recognized that song.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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