can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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