It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
