the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Please don't give away my fajitas
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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