Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(276): View more from Virginia

Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.

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(425): View more from Washington

Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'

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(214): View more from Texas

I got "discovered a new religion high" last night

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me

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(609): View more from New Jersey

And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS

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(630): View more from Illinois

Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.

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(206): View more from Washington

The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.

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(906): View more from Michigan

He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.

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