I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
