if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize