who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
