Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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