he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
