How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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