wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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