okay pat passed out under dana's car
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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