Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Terrible idea I love it
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
