you're like a bully in the Christmas story
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
