oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
