i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I am available for nakedness
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
