At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
