You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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