would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
