Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
