Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
