I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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