do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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