love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
