He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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