Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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