i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Congratulations! We have a period
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